This is what happened last few days
Saturday - drank
Sunday - felt OK, didn't drink
Monday - felt very down, hard to concentrate, didn't drink
Tuesday - felt very down, hard to concentrate, drank
Wednesday - feel better, little easier to concentrate
Even someone with no mental illness and not taking any 'crazy' drugs, if they drank like me, it would probably start to affect their moods. What if not drinking makes me more agitated because my body has grown dependent on it? What if I need to drink to feel better the next day?
Today I have still had problems concentrating and staying on task. Some real agitation and anxiety are breaking through. It sometimes feels hard to take a full breath, like I'm forgetting to breathe.